Saturday, October 4, 2008

Bury My Bursa Sac at Broken Heart

I have been caught up in those moments of deep thinking again. I know, I know… the medication was supposed to squelch that. The truth is that the kids at the local middle school give me so much money for my prescriptions that the economics leave me little choice but to sell. So with my mind unaltered by the healing gift of the pharmaceutical industry, I again share with my faithful blog readers the random thoughts and questions that occupy my beautiful mind.

I often wake up at night with the same nagging question… If I could trade my voice with anyone else, would I choose Sam Elliot, Alec Baldwin, or the Allstate guy from The Unit?

Was the four bulb rotating cube the last big development in the flash bulb industry, or did I miss any? That is a technology that continues to move so fast it is sometimes difficult to stay up.

Friends, I cannot stress this enough. Remember to roll in a ball whenever you jump from a moving car. Don’t get so caught up in the moment you forget to “ball up.”

All my life I have heard some silly expression about a million dollar smile. “She’s got a million dollar smile.” So, yesterday it occurred to me that perhaps there is some truth to that. Specifically I am wondering if she can use that smile to get chips at a casino. How would the dealer/pit boss exchange go? “Smile changing a million….” “Change a million.” Does she have to give up the smile when she receives the chips? Does she have to get the full million dollars in chips, or can she just change a portion of the smile for a lesser amount? Perhaps she can just use the incisors for $10,000 at the baccarat table.

Did Debra Gibson go back to Debbie or not? Ricky Schroeder went full circle, passing through Rick, and is back to being Ricky… maybe Deb’ can do the same.

I was thinking about The Great Space Coaster. Did anybody ever get onboard? I never got onboard? Surely somebody had to pay attention to the song and follow the instructions to get onboard, but I just never met any of those folks.

I keep meaning to ask one of my Indian friends… what exactly was the injury at Wounded Knee? Was it an ACL or a meniscus problem, or what?


Mark said...

OK Jeff, now I will read your blog on a more regular basis. The Great Space Coaster reference was the little push that was needed.

Jeff Skiver said...

Well, Mark, now I have a dilemma. I had only planned on continuing the blog long enough to make you a committed reader. Then I was going to stop it all to focus on my Communion/Passover bread baking business.

Life is all about what we do with these tough choices.

However, your enthusiasm has given me a change of heart and I am going to try to continue both the blogging and unleavened baking for a while longer.

Thank you for your support.

James said...

Have you considered the downside of recording all of your thought here? Isn't it possible that it will have a severe impact on your ability to get back out of the institution?

C'mon man think! - talk about self incrimination!

Jeff Skiver said...


Everything recorded in the blog goes through a 7 stage filtration process.

There is no doubt that the unfiltered (unpublished) thoughts on my computer's hard drive would clearly upset most of the civilized world if I were to mistakenly share them.

My unedited thoughts serve as a type of doomsday machine, however. Sure, their being made public would rule out my ever being part of the Management Bonus System. Yet, they are disturbing enough to cripple most of the major financial markets. I can assure you that within 10 minutes of my sharing my "REAL" thoughts, the markets in Tokyo and Hong Kong would look like they had been visited by something dropped from the Enola Gay. (Wait...did I say that?)

In fact, the SEC monitors most of my activities to make sure I am not buying Put Options and then publishing unfiltered brain droppings in order to profit from the crashing markets.

Few people outside of our little blog family would believe the power we have to influence the entire world.

Mad Jack Flint said...

Oh but mine was a battle between James Earl Jones - "People will come, Ray. People will most deifinitely come." or Sam Elliot as well. Since I have the Jones line down pretty good, I think I'd trade with Elliot. "Don't eat the big white mint."