Sunday, December 30, 2007

The Greatest Men Always Strive For Excellence

Well with the season Notre Dame had, New Year’s certainly doesn’t have any Bowl Game significance to me. So, I am just going to focus on self improvement.

For 2008, I am committing to the following resolutions:

1) This is the year I get off H
2) Stop slapping Gail for little stuff. Just emotionally abuse her for day to day issues. Save the whoopings for big stuff.
3) Finally do the right thing and register so my neighbors can be watching out for me.
4) Take up competitive knitting
5) Become more dedicated to my gambling. This is the year I'm due to finally win big
6) If I can’t stop cheating on Gail…at least stop hitting on the young stuff.
7) Learn some Arabic profanity
8) Do aerobics every day
9) Completely eliminate all vegetables from my diet
10) Stop being a slave to political correctness

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

So many things I never knew about you, son!

Your Father

Jeff Skiver said...

After receiving an email from my friend Tiffany (age 17 1/2) I need to add a quick clarification...

The phrase "young stuff" in Resolution #6 refers to pre-teens. (Basically, for 2008 I am not renewing my membership in the Warren Jeffs Dating Service and Chatline)

Tiff....we're still cool, Baby Girl.

Anonymous said...

I just want the world to know He doesn't beat me. If so his mother would kick his @$$.

Anonymous said...

Man, the comments are even funnier than the blog!