Tuesday, April 5, 2011

My Galoot Card Has Expired

My friend Ethan hit me up this morning to see if I had purchased another Panther Saw recently, and it got me thinking about the woeful state of my tool collecting.

I'm not sure if the Panther Saw I mentioned in February ever got relisted on Ebay. There have been a couple of others on Ebay in the last few weeks. One was in a similarly rough condition like the February sample, and the other was a very, very nice one.

Sadly, my tool purchasing is in hibernation at the moment. What have I been reduced to? Wisner Planes and Panther Saws are showing up on Ebay without a single bid from me. Full wooden boxed sets of Campagnolo tools are whizzing past without my ever raising a finger or screaming out a Dave Hester "YEEEEEEEEEEEEEPPPPPPPPP!!!!!!!!!!!!" to piss on the tree and mark my spot in the bidding frenzy. I haven't even stopped into any antique stores to scour the corners for heavy, steel farm wrenches presented in large, flip-top jewelry boxes.

Patrick Leach's email arrived this week, and I didn't even want to open it. I sat there wondering what I would do if I saw something I had to have yet had no liquid cash available for its purchase. My mind raced to thoughts of emailing Patrick and asking about a tax season layaway plan.... Then, I finally just sucked it up and decided I was man enough to scan the tool list in a pure window shopping mode.  Reading Patrick's email I now know what it's like for Wayne Gretzky to sit in the crowd and watch a hockey game.

Ultimately, I decided that, at the very least, I am still the Commander McBragg of Tool Collecting.

So, Ethan, did I ever tell you about the time I purchased all of the Mason's Tools used to build the Great Pyramid at Giza.............


Ethan said...

Wait a second... the LAST time you told that story, Jeff, it was just the one pyramid of Khafre.

Now you're saying you have the tools from Khufu and Menkaure, as well??

Jeff Skiver said...

Ahemmmm, quite. Ethan, these particular tools were used in the building of several pyramids and more than a few of Khafre's royal outhouses. I normally only mention the Great Pyramid at Giza as a means of keeping my stories short and terse. Quite. Quite.